At Leal Senado Square, I hear a voice from the middle of the air asking a question of :"why don't you guys develop knowledge of afterlife instead of being too obsessed with the material world?" It sounds like a voice from a "wise intelligent". I answer his/her question that it is understandable that many people here in Macau are too materialistic due to the fact that the development of the city has just started and the its major development is concentrated on economic development.
Then, my scene shifted. I am at somewhere else now. I see a black leather wallet is transforming itself into "another form of life". Watching the wallet transforms into another life form, it represents to me "the end of its life". I cry and I am so sad about the loss. All of sudden, I am connecting to the wise intelligent then he/she tells me that the wallet does not really die and it is just transforming into another life form to continue its journey. I reply to the wise intelligent that although the transformation does not imply the death of the wallet but the "wallet form" will be no longer exist, and I miss it. The wise intelligent says: "The process is needed indeed. It is essential for the evolution. Every stage is necessary including the loss of the previous form. It is part of the evolution."
Before I wake up, the image of Michael Jackson appears in my mind, suggesting that the wallet in the dream represents him...
(in waking life, my friend told me that MJ is going to have his last concerts in London between July of this year and February 2010. She wants me to be her company to go to the concerts.)
26th June, 2007 - A past life dream
…I’m in a Chinese temple or Japanese Ji (I think it is a temple, not sure about that, but it looks like one of them). There is a small blue kirin. It is so little and he has got horn. I’m the first person who experienced the dream. The kirin is chasing after me. He is playing with me!!! I notice that he walks without touching the ground. (likes floating in the air)… I see a big rectangular shape “stuff” in somewhere (for people to light up Chinese candles).
…My mom ignores me and walks to the pharmacy. There are two people around me. They are both European. The girl has got long curly brown hair and she is wearing eyeglasses. She walks up to me with a guy who is also wearing eyeglasses (actually he is Pedro!! My high school’s classmate.) The girl asks me to show her my bracelet (purple gemstone). I can feel that it is made by some special material by touching it (yea, I can feel it in my dream). Then, Pedro, (in my dream he is kind of … hermit or a Taoist Priest!!! He says not to let her touch my purple gemstone!! But she touches it already. I don’t care. Then, he asks me if I want to let him “assist” me to read my soul! (I remember quite well that in the dream he definitely said “assist” in English). He reads my soul by placing his palm above my left palm with my purple gemstone on it. Later, he tells me the word “funeral”. I ask him more details about it and I say I don’t mind whatever it is. Then, he tells me on twenty something of July (next month) there will be a “Mon Tao Hui 亡道會” (kind of festival or a ceremony of the deaths). I see a symbol of a pentacle on his hand, also I see a kind of Taoism tradition amulet, some red words (fine lines) written on a white paper…He tells me not to worry about the funeral, because funeral might represent a new start….Also, he tells me that “our” group is growing bigger, so maybe the funeral is representing the “new start” of the group! (what group? I have no idea that I’ve been joining a group!!) I guess I’ve been falling in love with him. I ask him if I can call him tonight if I am sleepless.
He tells me to follow him fastly to catch up the group. There are many people gathering on the street. They are heading to somewhere. They all dressed in costumes!! (A celebration? A Festival? I don’t know…). We have to change our clothes to join them. I see some Chinese words written on the clothe “大三…” (Big Three…)…
20th November, 2006 - Monkeys turn into dinosaurs
Somewhere like in a laboratory...it's so dark inside. I see many monkeys are locked inside the cages to my right hand side. There is a "man", he may be one of the worker in the laboratory. He injects some viruses inside the monkeys, then I suddenly have an idea that those monkeys will turn into horrible creature in a short period of time. Also, I see the gates everywhere are unlocked. They will run into the city!!!A voice says that! After that, I, Ken and another unfamiliar female figure get back to the laboratory. The place looks like very much my primary school. There are big dinosaurs, the monkeys really turn into dinosaurs. We hide in somewhere. One of the dinosaur sees us and walks up to us, then Ken tells me to not have any physical movement, so it can't see us if we remain still. Then, ken shoots the dinosaur at the back. Then, it attacks another dinosaur walk up to us. He doesn't see us and turns around and walks back to its place. Ken shoots it again. It falls down, then other dinosaur walks up to us and turns into a guard (human). This time that "thing" can think!! It learns intelligence. Then we get out of the place and uses the final bullet we have left. Ken tells me to stay there and don't move. That girl, is still hiding in somewhere, she stands up and shoot the rest of the dinosaurs to save us...After that, in a dream, I wake up and tell this dream to Ken. (still in the dream actually)
10th November, 2006 - The lost villagers
My mom is sick and she can't sleep in the middle of the night. I tell her to stay in the bed and try to sleep because healthy people have to sleep at least 8 hours per night. Also, I tell her that my coworkers recently only sleep less than 5 hours per night because they have to do lots of unfinished works, and they look so sick. Then I also sleep. Then, I see a movie director, he asks an actress to dress up in front of him. I see many scars at her back. Then, a man with eye glasses comes in the room and wants to hurt my mom. I hit him with a bunch and tell him to not hurt my mom. He is angry with the director. Later, he asks me to go with him, he says he wants to help me from a terrible event. I remember I see helicopter is coming to save him. I ask him to save my parents as well, but he says he could only save one person. I'm sad and I fall into the ocean... After awake, I find myself back to an island, where I used to live in before the disaster or terrible war had happened. I meet a lady. She asks me who I'm looking for. I tell her I'm coming back for my brother. I lost him in a war (or in a catastrophe) (I can't remember). I'm crying and tell her that my brother may still alive. Then, I see lots of papers and newspapers on the ground. I pick up a A4 size paper and I see my picture printed on it! My brother is looking for me!! My figure is so different from how I really look like in waking life. In that picture, I'm a nine - ten years old girl, wearing a black shirt with lace and have got blond hair and blue eyes. I'm so upset, because I realize that my brother has been looking for me for a long time. I feel so upset! (my brother looks like the man who wanted to save me before the war (or the catastrophe) hit the island). Then, I shout out loud: "What about my parent? Where are they??" I run to the village and look for them. I see no one in the village, everywhere is a ruin. There are lots of boxes and papers on the ground...I see a pack of souvenirs. It is wrap by a black card board, inside of it there are silver rocks, and silver dolls which I bought during the holidays with my parents in Maya (the Yucatan peninsula, a place where i wish to go in waking life). I realize that it was me who left this pack of souvenirs behind before the terrible disaster (I can't remember what it was, I only know that it has taken so much lives away). I find my hair also left inside the pack as a trace for my parents to know that I'm still alive. I'm so upset and I cry. "Where are my parents? Are they safe? Did my brother saved them?" I'm so confused and wondered what really happened in the village. Another girl comes along and asks me why I'm here. I tell her that I'm looking for my parents and also my brother. She calls her mom and try to figure out what had happened to the villagers. I ask her "Where are the villagers now? I can't find even a corpse here!! Do the helicopters saved them all??" She assumes that: "The villagers were forced to jump into the ocean by the attackers!! So, you can't find a single corpse here!! I can't believe that, they must be saved by my brother...At the same moment, the enemies came back and want to kill the rest of the villagers (me and the other girl) The girl is a rich person, she has got lots of body guards. I follow her to her island to start a new life where she wants to teach me agriculture. I refuse to learn it, because i'm still thinking of my parents. They may still alive!! I have to find them and I have to go back to that island to find them!! Then, I suddenly realize that it was just a story and it was myself who made it up. I cry and cry. I woke up and call my friend that I've been making up a sad story which everything can not be rewind!!! Everything is settled now and the story must ends up tragically. I see my daddy is in the living room. It was a dream but also a story made up by myself...
31st October, 2006 - Recalling memory from childhood
...I am at Ken's house. We are wearing really really thick clothes. His brother and his cousin just came home and they notice that someone has came to the house. They see a pair of big shoes. Ken's brother first recognize those shoes and he tells his cousin that those shoes belong to Ken's wife. She always wears BIG shoes!!! When they enter the house, they see us (I and Ken) sitting on the floor in the middle of the living room. Ken's brother says: "Look at them! They are still wearing the same old thick warm clothes!" I don't feel comfortable with his words. Following day, instead of wearing big boots as usual, I wear smaller type shoes...
...Ken's mom asks me what does my mom do? I tell her that my mom is retired and every morning she goes to do exercise to keep her body in shape, like walking around in the hills, practising "tai qi" and participating in chinese dancing. Ken's mom looks amazed that my mom is doing so well with her daily schedule. Inside my mind, I am thinking, what about my daddy? He likes always to sit in the living room and watch TV, he rarely shows his own character at all....
...I am looking at a photo album, I am comparing two photo books in which both of them are taken at the same place but at different date. The photo album at my left hand side, the photos were taken at the year of 1995, and the photos at my right hand side were taken at the year of 1999.
I can't recognize where the pictures were taken. I recognize my mom and her friend. But they look far older than the present moment... (I can't remember much about this part of dream)
...at my house, but it is distorted, my daddy and I are in a bedroom looking at something, then suddenly we hear a strange voice, it looks like a voice of St. Maria's figure. I'm so scared, then we go to the living room, and my daddy says he is waiting for my mom. I go to the balcony and see my sketch book is hanging at the balcony, it almost falls down, fortunately I take it back before it falls on the ground...at a square dining table, there are my daddy sitting at my right hand side, my uncle J. sitting opposite to me, my aunt sitting at my left hand side. Then, later, Ken comes along and sits in between my daddy and me. (it likes he replaces my daddy status - My mom also comes in and sits at my left hand side. I see we eat lots of meat! Uncle J. is getting weak, I heard something like 65 years old. Uncle thinks that he is still young even 60 something years old. I see someone's hand is trembling, so weak...they give meat to my aunt... everybody in the dining table looks healthy except uncle.
...I go to somewhere...it is dark outside, it looks like if it is in the evening, I see one of my childhood's teacher, she is teaching ten commandment to the children. It is different from what we learn in the waking state. I only remember that the first two are " You have to..." The third is " Do not kill your wife / husband" ... In a dream i am thinking, it feels so good that I have learned the commandment at childhood easily. Then I enter to a place...it looks like a church and it looks like Santa Rosa de Lima (my primary school) I change my perspective lower to feel like I am a child. Changing the perspective it makes me recall lots of memory from my childhood. I see Teresa Lei,...and others, I see our conversations in the past,...then, a phone call rings, I'm waiting Ken, but actually, she is Jessica (my classmate from the present moment- design) She calls me and says the classroom number to me. It is at third floor, number four. I say I 'm at third floor right now, I'm coming (but I am in the other building actually). I hurry up and heard something, something really nice. I go to the main hall and I see Maksim is playing the piano. I am so happy and I take out the camera and take his photo. He looks at me smiling, so sweet!!! When I take the picture, my digital camera works slowly, the shutter speed slow up, I can't take really nice photos, the photo appears shaken, it is disappointed. After he plays the pieces (I forgot the melody) he walks up to me. I ask him to take a photo with me. :) So sweet, and he is so sweet and nice!!! I wake up happily.
31st October, 2006 - Loss of teeth
(the dream upon awakening) I tell Ken what I have been dreaming in the previous dream. I tell him I change my sight to a lower perspective (about children's height) to look at the world, and it makes me recall lots of memory from childhood. We enter a noodle restaurant. It is crowded. I don't enjoy very much eating at a crowded restaurant. Later, I think of owning a noodle restaurant and hire my daddy and mom as a reception only to deal with money. At the same time I am thinking that my daddy always looks angry, so what if my mom replace his status? Then, each week we earn some money and we share the money. Each of us (me and my parents) will have a hundred to 2 hundreds profit per week. At my home, my daddy suggests to transfer 15,000.00 patacas from Bank of Tai Fung to another account to receive a gift - an electronic toothbrush. I say I don't want it because I always have sore gums so electronic toothbrush is not suitable for me. I enter to bathroom to brush my teeth. I feel pain in the lower front right teeth. I brush it, brush it, then I feel the three front teeth (the lower part) are loosen. I'm scared and I'm thinking to see a doctor. When I finish clean my mouth, three of the lower front teeth are lost. I'm so scared, the feeling is so real and I tell myself: "Please, this is not real! This is not real! It is only a dream! Please! This is only a dream!" Then I wake up. I'm so scared.